We won't say our goodbyes,
You know it's better that way.
We won't break,
We won't die.
It's just a moment of change.

Lets not do this
say what you need to say

Now about change. I don't really like change. Maybe its the hassle of getting used to new things that distances me from change. Or maybe I just don't like being pulled out of my personal bubble. All I know is change is a lot of work. It causes many unnecessary headaches and problems, internal and external. But Sometimes change is what we need. Many times, we spend monumental amounts of time doing something that in no way whatsoever benefits ourselves. We continue to lose ourselves to the daily routine until one day we realize that we've wasted years on frivolous endeavors that have brought us no closer than we were the first day we approached them. Only after leaving these endeavors behind, do you finally realize who you are and what you can do. you suddenly gain freedom, momentum, and perspective upon life. Life ceases to be like a box of chocolates and suddenly you gain control once again. You begin to realize that sometimes you have to stand on your own two feet and walk. Some may have forgotten to walk alone, They have leaned on others for too long, but in the end it is our nature to make it through

and it is what it is.

This entry is for someone and you will know its you.
I'm going to start off by calling you an idiot,
you're always over thinking what I say.
A lot of the time, you think I'm always picking on you
or making fun of you, when in fact, you're the person
I worry about the most and take care of the most.
Sometimes I might get mad and yell at you
but you know that I dont mean it. Don't take things I
say so heavily. You know what I mean every time I say
something that you think is ridiculous. Simplify things,
you know i'm a complicated and I know you're a complicated
person as well. Lastly, when you mention how I always
say that you blah blah, you know that I think you're a good person
so thus whatever I say has no bearing on you.

so with this I request that I have immunity from your anger from now on

October 28th - November 1st

"You earned the title "Marine" upon graduation from boot recruit training. It wasn't willed to you; it isn't a gift. It is not a government subsidy. Few can claim the title; no one can take it away. It is yours forever."

It just might work out

I always told myself I'd never start a blog because I didn't have anything intelligent to write. But then again maybe I just need to vent to myself. Beauty in the eyes of the beholder right? The one place where I have the free time and motivation to write up a masterpiece is at work. There is something so peculiar about sitting in a small eight by eight cubicle typing away at a computer. At first you dress to impress, wearing nice button-ups and slacks, showing up early to work after prettying yourself up in the morning. But as time goes on things begin to degenerate. Slacks become jeans, jeans become sweatpants, sweatpants become khaki shorts, khaki shorts become basketball shorts. Button-ups become shirts which become undershirts leading all the way to the bottom of the ladder of the same sweatshirt day after day after day. So essentially although I used to go to work looking like a Korean drama star, now I go looking like a lazy Asian college boy (which is essentially what I've become). To be perfectly honest, this cubicle programming life is not for me for three reasons

1. It is not interactive ~ I need to be able to talk to people at some point about something other than problems with code, why programming sucks, and why our vendor doesn't care.
2. It is not interesting ~ I write easy database code for a company that makes applications for IRB staff (asking for research grants) who honestly cares about this stuff.
3. My vision already sucks ~ sitting in front of a computer for 8 hours then going home and sitting on a computer for the rest of the night doesn't really help those corneas and pupils.

The fact of the matter is that I can think of a lot of better things that I could do than be here. But I want to live my lavish lifestyle so I show up every now and then to remind them that I'm still alive. On a random note, its funny how things change, how people change. Mostly people, because things are bound to change but its the people that you tend to lean on when you need them. What happens if they're not there anymore to be your foundation. If one foundation crumbles, others can still support the building, but if too many disappear then it all comes falling down. I never liked Shakespeare, but the bard has some good lines which I'll end with.

"All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages."

I dont want to be on the stage, I want to be watching on the balcony